Decoloniz/ed Nonviolent Communication (DNVC)
Nonviolent Communication (NVC) is a value system and a way of living as well as a communication model. It outlines a language, thinking, communication skills and means of influence that support that way of living. The intent is to remind us about how we humans were meant to relate to one another – and to assist us in living in a way that concretely manifests this knowledge.
Nonviolent communication (NVC) is a communication framework developed by Marshall Rosenberg, with the aim of fostering empathy, understanding, and resolving conflicts without resorting to violence. While NVC is often presented as a universally applicable tool for communication, it is important to recognize that its application can be nuanced and may not be equally effective or accessible for everyone, especially marginalized and oppressed communities.
Decolonize/ed Nonviolent Communication (DNVC) recognizes the pitfalls of mainstream NVC such as the tendency to individualize systemic issues by focusing on individual interactions and personal responsibility; privilege-blindness and failure to critically examine power dynamics; unconscious cultural & language imperialism, reinforce colonial narratives, add burden of emotional labor on those who are already marginalized, repackage blame and avoid accountability, etc.,
DNVC works to ensure that it does not perpetuate harmful power dynamics, erase cultural identities, or place additional burdens on marginalized peoples. A decolonized approach ensures that DNVC becomes a tool for self-determination, social justice, and collective liberation rather than a weapon for maintaining the status quo, cultural assimilation and neocolonialism.
Communication Matters trainings are based on the principles of (D)NVC and provides specific tools to empower ourselves and others to live more in line with our values and deeper needs. When we do that, we become more effective in relating to ourselves, family members, people we work and live with and alongside. This is a dialogue process aimed at a particular form of consensus: solutions to meet both parties’ needs. Recognizing that human needs are never in conflict with each other; only strategies can be in conflict, we ensure that both parties hear and connect fully with each other’s needs. Than we support parties to look together for strategies that would meet as many of those needs as possible for all people involved in the conflict.
By using language that reflects the consciousness of needs and requests rather than that of blame, judgment or domination, we learn to engage in dialogue that creates trust and connection, and to create mutual understanding where we can meet more people’s needs more peacefully and more fully.
It is a powerful interpersonal method for repairing and building trust, for resolving conflicts, for reconciliation and has many applications, ranging from family relationships, work settings, health care, social services, police, to governments, schools, to business as well as social change organizations (NGOs).
Understanding the limitations and potential privileges associated with Nonviolent Communication allows for a more nuanced approach to communication that takes into account the complex realities of power dynamics, cultural diversity, and the need for broader systemic social change efforts in parallel to achieve the vision of creating a world that works for all. Decoloniz/ed Nonviolent Communication (DNVC) can support individuals and groups of people to work together effectively and powerfully to support this goal.